"Time, like an ever-rolling stream, bears all its sons away;
They fly, forgotten, as a dream dies at the opening day."
Rub-a-dub-dub
It's time for a scrub
So through clouds of steam
To a cracked and faded cream bath-tub
Wanders frail Aphrodite,
So pale, pink and white
She is naked as sin
Wearing nothing but a grin
And a pin in her hair
Will she be drowned?
Found with her hair tied behind
Shoulders back and head inclined
To the sound of music playing above
Bathing her in love
The darkness and fear will disappear like the soap
When she opens her eyes
She throws back the dormer windows
Morning light shows
Ophelia raised from her watery grave
In a brave new world
Promenade
Release Date
Mar 1994
Promenade is the third studio album and features: Tonight We Fly and The Summerhouse.

-
Bath
-
-
Going Downhill Fast
One butterfly spies a glint in his eye
The birds sing as he cycles by
Oh, why should he feel sad
This world ain't so bad and besides
Woe betide he who would frown
When natural beauty abounds
And now, with wheels spinning free
He's picking up speed
Two butterflies tie knots in his stomach
They love it when he goes too fast
The wind whistles past
Vast oceans of air that will mess up his hair
Though he no longer cares anymore
For over-indulgence in vanities vacuous vice
Just once or twice, thrice
Four times in five we forget we're alive
And neglect to remind ourselves
Wait, wait for me
Oh great Mercury!
As late as you may be
Will you wait for me?
Three butterflies realise when it's time to depart
They have tickled his ribs
They have fluttered his heart
But the starting is easy compared to the stop
And the bottom is hard when compared to the top -
-
The Booklovers
"This book deals with epiphenomenalism, which has to do with consciousness as a mere accessory of physiological processes whose presence or absence... makes no difference... whatever are you doing?"
Aphra Benn: Hello
Cervantes: Donkey
Daniel Defoe: To christen the day!
Samuel Richardson: Hello
Henry Fielding: Tittle-tattle Tittle-tattle...
Lawrence Sterne: Hello
Mary Wolstencraft: Vindicated!
Jane Austen: Here I am!
Sir Walter Scott: We're all doomed!
Leo Tolstoy: Yes!
Honoré de Balzac: Oui...
Edgar Allen Poe: Aaaarrrggghhhh!
Charlotte Brontë: Hello...
Emily Brontë: Hello...
Anne Brontë: Hellooo..?
Nikolai Gogol: Vas chi
Gustav Flaubert: Oui
William Makepeace Thackeray: Call me 'William Makepeace Thackeray'
Nathaniel Hawthorne: The letter 'A'
Herman Melville: Ahoy there!
Charles Dickens: London is so beautiful this time of year...
Anthony Trollope: good-good-good-good evening!
Fyodor Dostoevsky: Here come the sleepers...
Mark Twain: I can't even spell 'Mississippi'!
George Eliot: George reads German
Emile Zola: J'accuse
Henry James: Howdy Miss Wharton!
Thomas Hardy: Ooo-arrr!
Joseph Conrad: I'm a bloody boring writer...
Katherine Mansfield: (cough cough)
Edith Wharton: Well hello, Mr James!
DH Lawrence: Never heard of it
EM Forster: Never heard of it!
Happy the man, and happy he alone
Who in all honesty can call today his own;
He who has life and strength enough to say
'Yesterday's dead and gone - I want to live today'
James Joyce: Hello there!
Virginia Woolf: I'm losing my mind!
Marcel Proust: Je me'en souviens plus
F Scott Fitzgerald: baa bababa baa
Ernest Hemingway: I forgot the....
Hermann Hesse: Oh es ist alle so häßlich
Evelyn Waugh: Whoooaarr!
William Faulkner: Tu connait William Faulkner?
Anaïs Nin: The strand of pearls
Ford Maddox Ford: Any colour, as long as it's black!
Jean-Paul Sartre: Let's go to the dome, Simone!
Simone de Beauvoir: C'est exact present
Albert Camus: The beach... the beach
Franz Kafka: WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!
Thomas Mann: Mam
Graham Greene: Call me 'pinky', lovely
Jack Kerouac: Me car's broken down...
William S Burroughs: Wowwww!
Happy the man, and happy he alone
Who in all honesty can call today his own;
He who has life and strength enough to say
'Yesterday's dead and gone - I want to live today'
Kingsley Amis: (cough)
Doris Lessing: I hate men!
Vladimir Nabokov: Hello, little girl...
William Golding: Achtung Busby!
JG Ballard: Instrument binnacle
Richard Brautigan: How are you doing?
Milan Kundera: I don't do interviews
Ivy Compton Burnett: Hello...
Paul Theroux: Have a nice day!
Günter Grass: I've found snails!
Gore Vidal: Oh, it makes me mad!
John Updike: Run rabbit, run rabbit, run, run, run...
Kazuro Ishiguro: Ah so, old chap!
Malcolm Bradbury: stroke John Steinbeck, stroke JD Salinger
Iain Banks: Too orangey for crows!
AS Byatt: Nine tenths of the law, you know...
Martin Amis: (burp)
Brett Easton Ellis: Aaaaarrrggghhh!
Umberto Eco: I don't understand this either...
Gabriel Garcia Marquez: Mi casa es su casa
Roddy Doyle: ha ha ha!
Salman Rushdie: Names will live forever... -
-
A Seafood Song
"Who'll have the fishy on the little dishy?
Who will have the fishy when the boat comes..."
And then he says...
"With our glasses both raised in a toast
Let's sing for those in peril on the sea
Who cater ceaselessly to my every wish
With every fish as fresh as fish can be you see
I'm into my oysters, my king prawns and caviar
And no matter how far away they are I'll be there!"
And then she says...
"Now with our glasses both raised in this toast
Let's sing for those in peril on the sea
Who labour tirelessly in their tiny boats off John O' Groats
Their socks soaked for me, you see
I do like my lobster, my hake, skate and rainbow trout
And if there's a fishy smell about I'll be there!"
And then, and then we'll sing
For those in peril on the sea
Don't be frightened, don't be scared
Chop off their heads and little legs
Then peel away the shell and open up your senses to the smell
The sound and colour, touch and taste
Of crab, cod, clams and kippers
Scampi, squid, sole, shark and scallop
Winkles, whelks, whale and whiting
Seaweed, swordfish, sardines and sea urchin
Haddock, halibut, herrings and eel
Cockles, mussels, mackerel and veal
Pilchard, plankton, St Peter's fish and plaice
Octopuss, jellyfish and dolphin's an aquired taste
"Who will have the fishy on the little dishy?
I will have the fishy when the boat comes in" -
-
Geronimo
While they have been eating the rain has started falling
Gradually gathering in strength
What began a drizzle has now become torrential
And doesn't look like coming to an end
The two bedraggled figures that huddle in the doorway
With nothing vaguely waterproof to wear
Are now secretly wishing they'd listened to their mothers
When being told to always be prepared
Screaming 'Geronimo!', they run for it down the road
With an arm around her waist, he leads her to a place he knows
Soaked through but happy, they squelch up to the landing
The room before them makes a welcome sight
The coal fire is throwing strange shapes upon the hearthrug
And crying out to be knelt down beside
She pulls off her jumper and flings it in the corner
He picks it up and hangs it on a chair
She puts on a record and sings into her coffee
He puts a blanket round her, sits her down and dries her beautiful hair -
-
Don't Look Down
Birds and planes go through the rainbow everyday
Though you simply refuse
Old-fashioned Ferris Wheels are no big deal
They're just big wheels with chairs
So don't be scared, set yourself free
She tells me it's all right to open up my eyes
She holds onto my hand and the clouds float by
The couple in the car below, they wave to us and say hello
I think they understand the way we're feeling
I don't need to say 'I love you'
When we're floating so far up above
Everyone else's lives are intertwined with yours and mine
I hope they find the joy that we have found
She tells me it's alright to open up my eyes
She holds onto my hand and the clouds race by
The couple in the car above, well I suppose they think that we're in love
I think they might be right
And without warning when we're almost at the top
The wheel that turns us all comes to a sudden stop
The wind that's blown us dies a quick and painless death
The air gets clammy and we hold each other's breath
We get the feeling that we're not alone in this
And then a God who really ought not to exist
Sticks out a great big hand and grabs me by the wrist
And asks me "why?" and I say "Well God, it's like this
It may be arrogance or just appalling taste
But I'd rather use my pain than let it all go to waste
On some old god who tells me what I want to hear
As if I cannot tell obedience from fear
I want to take my pleasures where and how I will
Be they disgraceful or distasteful or distilled
And to be frank I find that life has more appeal
Without a driver who's asleep behind the wheel"
Then God decides that he has taken quite enough
Of all this atheistic tosh I'm spouting off
And so he calls upon his favourite angel choir
To sing of times when men were filled with christian fire
But over-zealous angels flap their wings too fast
And cause the wind to blow and turn the wheel at last
And soon my feet are safely back on solid ground
And then I hear a voice say "Don't look down!" -
-
When The Lights Go Out All Over Europe
Twilight turns from amethyst to deep and deeper blue
We've got an hour or two before it's time to go
Let's go see a movie show
Jeanne can't choose between the two
'Cos Jules is hip and Jim is cool
And so they live together
With the trees and birds
And little girls
Who play upon poor Jean-Claude's nerves
Till finally he strokes Claire's knee
And when she asks of his ambition, Jean-Pierre replies
"My mission is to become eternal and to die..."
Heaven knows the reason why
When the lights go out all over Europe
I forget about old Hollywood,
'Cause Doris Day could never make me cheer up
Quite the way those French girls always could
Jean Seberg: Et puisque je suis mechante avec toi c'est la preuve que je ne suis pas amoureuse de toi
Jean Paul Belmondo: On dit qu'il n'y a pas d'amour heureux
Jean Seberg: Si je t'aimais... oh c'est trop complicé
Jean Paul Belmondo: Au contraire, il n'y a pas d'amour malheureux
Jean Seberg: Je veux que les gens s'occupant pas de moi et puis je suis independente... Peut etre que tu m'aimes?
Jean Paul Belmondo: C'est ce que lu crois, mais tu ne l'ai pas
Jean Seberg: C'est pour ca que je t'ai denonce
Jean Paul Belmondo: Je te suis superieur
Jean Seberg: Maintenant tu es force de partir
Jean Paul Belmondo: Tu es single, c'est lamentable comme raisonnment...
When the lights go out all over Europe
I forget about old MGM
'Cause Paramount was never Universal
And Warners went out way back
When those lights go out all over Europe
I forget about old Hollywood
'Cause Doris Day could never make me cheer up
Quite the way those French girls always could -
-
The Summerhouse
Do you remember the way it used to be
June to September in a cottage by the sea
Distant cousins, local kids
We climbed every tree together
And it never ever rained
Till we climbed back on the train
That would take us so far away
From the village and the bay
And the summerhouse
Where we found new games to play
Do you remember Sunday lunch on the lawn
Daring escapes at midnight
And costumeless bathes at dawn
You were only nine years old
And I was barely ten
It's kind of weird to be back here again
Do you remember The summerhouse...? -
-
Neptune's Daughter
When the last course has been consumed
They withdraw to the drawing room
Where the Schubert she plays with style
Keeps her friends happy for the while
But the memories are a burden,
So she draws back both the curtains
Stepping out into the night
As the glow from the house recedes
And their voices blend with the breeze
She is free to be who she will
Free to skip barefoot down the hill
Maybe she is Neptune's daughter
For she's drawn towards the water
Stepping out into the night
The water cold against her skin
Conceals a multitude of sins
And laughing like a little girl
She enters an enchanted world
Where seaweed girls with silver tails
Play games upon the backs of whales
They want her to come home with them
They grab her legs and drag her
Down again, down again
Into the sea he strides and takes her in his arms
And he carries her back to shore -
-
A Drinking Song
Back at the house a bottle is found
And opened in honour of those who have drowned
While we who have not are stricken with guilt
And dutifully see that not one drop is spilt
We're drinking to life, we're drinking to death
We're drinking till none of our livers are left
We're wending our way down to the spirit store
We'll drink till we just can't drink anymore
Raise your glasses high
Drink the cellar dry
Well, bloody my nose and blacken my eye
If it ain't some young Turk in search of a fight
And chanticleer's chest is sagging with pride
For honour has yet to be satisfied
Well, heaven be thanked we live in an age
When no man need bother except on the stage
With 'Dulce et decorum est pro patria mori'
And definitely not tonight
I can still remember when I was just a kid
I was free to do what I wanted to but I never, ever did
So now with years of discretion reached
May we not forget - Liberté, Egalité, Fraternité
For there's life in the Old World yet!
There'll always be an England
An Ireland and a France
A Liechtenstein and Finland
And we have only one chance
Earnest young man with an unhealthy tan
Puts a drink in my hand and says, "I understand
You're in search of the place to continue the chase
Of the heavenly taste, I suggest in that case
You all come with me to my place by the sea
Where the glasses shall be overflowing with free
Alcoholic delights (and free love if you like)
For what point has this life if you can't realise your dreams?"
Oh, raise your glasses high
And drink the town dry
We'll drink beyond the boundaries of sense
We'll drink till we start to see lovely pink elephants
Inside our heads, inside our beds
Inside the threads of our pyjama legs
So don't shoot til you see the reds of our eyes
And an army of elephants marching behind
From the day I was born till the night I will die
All my lovers will be pink and elephantine -
-
Ten Seconds To Midnight
10
Apes turn into men
And grapes turn into wine
How we made it to 9 I'll never know
8
Man looks for a mate
But fate plays cruel tricks
And 7 turns to 6
Still he's alone
Along comes number 5
Eureka, I'm alive
I think, there 4, I am a lucky man
3
From this balcony
The 2 of us can see
The house where we first met 1 wet Sunday -
-
Tonight We Fly
Tonight we fly
Over the houses the streets and the trees
Over the dogs down below
They'll bark at our shadows
As we float by on the breeze
Tonight we fly
Over the chimney tops, skylights and slates
Looking into all your lives
And wondering why happiness is so hard to find
Over the doctor, over the soldier
Over the farmer, over the poacher
Over the preacher, over the gambler
Over the teacher
Over the rambler, over the lawyer
Over the dancer, over the voyeur
Over the builder and the destroyer
Over the hills and far away
Tonight we fly
Over the mountains, the beach and the sea
Over the friends that we've known
And those that we now know
And those who we've yet to meet
And when we die
Oh, will we be that disappointed or sad?
If heaven doesn't exist what will we have missed?
This life is the best we've ever had -

Albums
-
Charmed Life - The Best Of
-
Office Politics
-
Foreverland
-
Bang Goes The Knighthood
-
Victory For The Comic Muse
-
Absent Friends
-
Regeneration
-
A Secret History (The Best Of...)
-
Fin de Siècle
-
A Short Album About Love
-
Casanova
-
Liberation
-
Fanfare For The Comic Muse

Singles
-
The Best Mistakes
-
Infernal Machines/You'll Never Work In This Town Again
-
Norman And Norma
-
Queuejumper
-
To The Rescue
-
How Can You leave Me On My Own
-
Catherine The Great
-
I Like
-
At The Indie Disco
-
A Lady of A Certain Age
-
To Die A Virgin
-
Diva Lady
-
Absent Friends
-
Come Home Billy Bird
-
Perfect Lovesong
-
Bad Ambassador
-
Love What You Do
-
Gin Soaked Boy
-
The Pop Singer's Fear Of The Pollen Count
-
National Express
-
The Certainty Of Chance
-
Generation Sex
-
I've Been To A Marvellous Party
-
Everybody Knows (Except You)
-
The Frog Princess
-
Becoming More Like Alfie
-
Something For The Weekend